Fandom High School

"Alright, guys," Summer came into the class just a smidge late, with her arms full of a box of donuts and a to-go carrier of drinks, "hope you didn't get too comfortable, because we're skipping the preamble and getting right into it today, since it's our last class and maybe we might even get out a little early since it's a national holiday."

4/20 was not a national holiday, Summer.

The portal had pretty much been ready to go even before Summer got there, and, unless anyone was feeling particularly ambitious and decided to forge ahead without her, she told everyone to get up and hop on through and they'll get started...

....in another classroom.

That looked exactly like the classroom they'd just been in. Except, actually, no, wait, it wasn't exactly the same. At first glance, it definitely looked like it, but the more you looked, the more you noticed the little details: the blackboard was actually dark green, the style of the desks were different, the desk at the front was actually bigger, and the numbers on the clock on the wall were unfamiliar. A glance out the window would reveal not a scenic view of an island off the coast of Maryland, but instead surrounding snow-capped mountains. There was something a little off about the birds flying around out the window, too, and it probably wouldn't take too long to notice a chipmunk scribbling away in a tiny notebook in the room, too.

Summer made no comments on any of this, sliding the box of donuts next to another box of donuts that was already on the desk, and putting down the drink. She opened both boxes: both had donuts, but different donuts from the other. And then she turned to the class.

"So I brought treats," she explained, "because it's the last class and I'd mostly like to just talk about what we experienced here, so come on up and grab some donuts if you want, I didn't know what you guys like to drink, so there's coffee, tea, and hot chocolate to choose from. And then we're just going to...talk. About what you guys learned in this class, how you're feeling about it, was there something you wished we'd done more of, do you have any further general questions? And I mean, we can also still definitely go somewhere else if there's something you still want to experience and I know a good way to go there, too. So....yeah. That's the class today. I'll mostly hand it over to you guys.

"Although, even if we stay put, we do have to head back a little earlier than usual, because eventual, this dimension's version of this class is going to show up to use the classroom. And while it's actually generally untrue that if you meet your doppleganger, you die in mmost dimensions, the version of me in this dimension is blonde, and it really just weirds me out."

Also, she did tend to have a bad habit of getting into fights with herself in these encounters, and she was pretty sure both she and her blonde!dimension self would agree that that was not a cute look.

"So," said Summer, from her usual spot leaning against the desk in the front of the classroom with this week's portal (thankfully not one of her own, no one needed that right now) waiting behind her, "this week is one of those weeks where, if I was teaching this class anywhere else, I would totally be all, 'so, okay, this is going to sound wild, but hear me out, there's this island off the coast of Maryland that, every once in a while, for a whole week, there is literally something in the air that will make you all hot and bothered and horny AF, and if you don't believe me, oh boy, get ready to eat those words and probably awaken something inside of you that you didn't even know was there!' Because, if you haven't figured it out yet, spoiler alert, that's exactly what's going on this week.

"Now," she continued, very matter-of-fact, "it's possible that some of you aren't even effected by it. And for almost everyone, it's going to hit a little different. Some people love this week, and it's really not difficult to see why. Others are made super-uncomfortable by it, either from the emotions themselves or just the fact that it's kind of fucked up that they're so out of control of their feelings and urges. And any of those reactions are perfectly valid and normal. It's kind of one of those weeks where you sort of buckle in and bear it, exploit it, or..."

She gestured toward the portal.

"Get the hell out of dodge for a while. Because one of the nice things about some of the things that happen on this island is that this place is a little microcosm where these events? Only touch this island. So, assuming something's not happening to fuck with portal travel, which is a thing, or blocking your access to the mainland, which is also a thing sometimes, you can just...leave. And obviously, this is a portal class, so that's exactly what we're going to be doing right now, so those of you who aren't really too pleased about all your newly amormous inclinations toward the fact that this island is pretty much stuffed to the brim with impossibly attractive people, well, you'll get a little bit of relief, at least for the class period. And if you're totally super into this week and want to take a pass to go take a little more advantage of it, gurl, take that pass. Get out of here, do your thing, just be safe about it and use protection and shit.

"So where are we going this week? Well, I thought about maybe going somewhere else that has these sort of emotion-altering events, but honestly? Anywhere like that I know of tends to be, like, super-aggro or so chill to the point where it's dangerous because, like, you will not want to get out of there, and I also thought about trying to find some of the most un-sexy universes or planets out there, but...it's bad enough that we have to deal with one emotion-altering event, and no one needs greasy grandmas or hamsters living in butts right now, so we're just going to hit up a really cool place that we don't even need to go to another galaxy, dimension, or even another planet for, because it's right here on this one. I know we're alla bout roving the galaxy and shit, but Earth can really get it sometimes, too. So we're actually heading to this giant natural park in Singapore called Gardens by the Bay, to enjoy a really cool mix of modern human aesthetics and natural splendor, and to be around plants that will hopefully just fill you with awe and not, you know, other things.

"I mean," she added, putting her hands up, "unless you're super into that. No kink-shaming here."

"Hey, guys," Summer greeted the class as per usual in the classroom, with this week's portal glowing and ready behind her already, "sorry again about the whole weird candy factory thing last week, but, I mean, come on, you have to admit it, that candy kind of made it worth it, right? Anyway, I thought this week we'd do one of those jaunts that focus on the dimensionality of it all, by going to another version of Earth that's almost exactly like this one, with a few key differences. Now, the biggest key difference of this dimension was that a popular TV series from another dimension actually managed to go its own movie, and we're going to go there and hit up the theater where I first saw it a few years back for its, like, special anniversary viewing, or whatever, but since then, through a series of events that we will not go into right now," because they were super traumatic and terrible, and, look, everyone dealt with their trauma in different ways, Summer just dealt with hers by taking whole ass classes to sites where it happened, "this dimension's Earth was also taken over by giant telepathic spiders."

You think she might have thought to lead with that.

"Don't worry, though," she assured them, "they're actually really cool and chill and there's sort of a whole symbiosis going on, or whatever, but, anyway, unless there's some questions before we go, everybody get up, and let's go watch a really dumb movie on Spider-Earth. If you're feeling bold, I highly recommend the ice cream while we're here. Sure, to help broker peace with the spiders so that they would stop creating web traps to lure humans into for consumption, the ice cream has flies in it now, but it's really not that bad, especially when you consider that this ice cream used to be the best ice cream in the multiverse."

"Hey, everyone," said Summer from the front of the classroom as usual with a little wave of her hand. "I hope you're feeling both limber in body and mind this afternoon, because we're sort of extending our lesson on defense and fighting and stuff when things go bad with a little exercise in how normal things...like, say," she gestured to the object in question dangling from her mouth, "a toothpick can sometimes be used to defend yourself and probably save your life. That's why I've got Ms. Blackstone here with us today," and now that expressive hand was gesturing toward Amaya, who stood up at the front of the class with Summer, and also lifted a hand in a wave, "with us, because she actually sometimes teaches whole semesters about stuff like this, so she's a good person to have on board if you want to get creative with how to make a bunch of stuff into weapons.

"Now, we are going to the Danger Shop today," she continued, "because I kind of thought about it, and going to a different place expecting to have to fight and possibly kill actual living things was a little fucked up, so we're just running a sim instead. But we are taking a portal," she hitched her thumb over her shoulder to the portal that usually waited for them, "to the Danger Shop, because it's still a portal class."

Plus...hilarious.

"So everyone up, let's get going, and let's see what we can find to help us out. Now, if you are the type that usually has a weapon on you, that's great, but, sometimes, something might happen and you might not have it or something's wrong with it, or who even knows what, anything is possible, so it's still good to have a few backup plans and ideas, too, y'know? Anyway, let's get moving, shall we?"

And, with that, Summer hopped in, Amaya followed, and she expected them to all follow suite or else she'd hop right on back to see if one of those anything is possible scenarios was going on and she'd have to see how taking a portal just to the danger shop had somehow managed to go awry...

At the front of the class, toothpick in mouth, portal waiting and ready to go behind them, Summer didn't have a lot of preamble for today's class, so she'd just get right into it.

"So next week, of course, is the school trip," she offered, "which, you know, basic portal travel stuff to another location on usually the same Earth, same time, sometimes same dimension, but not always. It's really hard to tell until we get there, but, either way, it's definitely going to be a different culture, which is an important thing to experience, you know? Japan's kind of interesting because it's gone through some periods of imperialism, it's gone through some periods of isolationism, and since World War II, it's definitely gotten very 'Westernized,'" the finger quote and the roll of her eyes there was clear indication that there was a whole rant in there somewhere, but she'd save that for another class, "so it very distinctly has its own culture, but it's also fairly accessable, too.

"Not so much with the place we're going today. Quick rundown: it's called Glaagablaaga, and the people who live there are called Garblovians. On the surface, there might seem to be some similarities between their culture and ours, but they don't speak a word of a Common language like English, which, for some reason, is actually really widely known around the galaxy, who knew? Anyway, they don't speak it, they do seem to understand it, though, but they have their own language and they are fully convinced that you understand it perfectly, which I'm assuming you do not. So let's go and see what we can do to work on some communication skills by interacting with some Garblovians.

"Oh," she added, after gesturing for them all to come up and slip on through the portal, "one more thing: they do tend to randomly explode, so if that happens, don't be startled, it's just a thing, and I promise you, the blue goo really does wash right off."

There were space suits in the classroom that day, so hopefully that would mean that everyone should guess where they all might be going this week!

Or, well, considering the class, there was a good chance that some of them would be wondering what the fuck spacesuits even were, but if Summer believed in things like learning curves, she was very bad at implimenting them.

"Suit up, everyone!" she announced cheerfully. "And please let me know if you need help, because you do not want to mess this up, even if we're only going to be needing these for the first, like, ten minutes or so of class. Because today, we're going to tap into a little bit of both the location as well as the dimensional aspects of portal travel by traveling to two locations that are the same place but are very different based on the dimension, to the far reaches of this solar system: Pluto!

"So once everyone's ready so no body freezes to death and we can all, you know, breathe when we get there, let's hitch this thing," she pointed a thumb over her own suited up shoulder, "to a place whose only relevence is thanks to a bunch of people who just can't get over galactic cancel culture."

Stop the presses, everyone. Summer was actually having her class meet in an actual classroom this semester. Not even the Danger Shop classroom, which, while still hilarious to her, maybe seemed a little excessive for a class that was going to get pretty excessive as it was. An actual classroom.

It felt a little weird, tbh.

So it was a good thing they weren't going to be there for long, as indicated by the big glowing portal at the front of the classroom waiting patiently for them.

"Hey, everyone," Summer greeted them with a smile as once it was time to get started, "and welcome to 'Have Portal, Will Travel,' a class I hope works as a good guide for both experienced portal travelers and complete newbs alike. So, if you didn't know, I'm Summer Smith, I had some pretty wild experience with portals even before coming to this school, and that experience has only grown since there, and now I want to share what I've learned over the years with you all! I'm seeing a lot of names on the roster which are new to me, which is great," or it meant that she'd scared off most of the people who usually take her classes, "but that also means I'm not sure exactly where everyone is on the level of multidimensional travel, so that's what this week's class is mostly going to be about. Who you are, where you're from, the level of your portal and/or multidimensional traveling experience thus far, and what you actually might like to get from this class. I'm planning a lot of various different locations to portal to that'll hopefully run the gammut of multidimensional experiences, but since we're all already from such different and interesting places, I'd love to get some ideas as to what you'd like. Also, if there's anything in particular I should avoid...alllergies, phobias, big oh hell no red flags...please, please, please let me know. And also keep in mind that I do have my own portal gun," displayed now everyone to see, "so if things get a little too much and a quick exit needs to be made, not even due to danger, maybe just because that day's particular trip is just not going to work for you, we got you covered.

"Also, I've got one of these," she added, putting away the portal gun and replacing it with her blaster gun, "which is to say that weapons are not only encouraged in this class, but sometimes might actually be necessary, just please be careful, since this is not the Danger Shop, these are actual legit portals and everything, so there will be consequences, I've got a Quick Setting on the portal gun that'll portal you straight to the clinic here if, you know, you need to, but hopefully, that won't be necessary. Guess there's only one way to find out, though, right?

"Since I figured having a class about portals and then not even using a portal to go somewhere on the first class is kind of a dick move, though, I have just a nice little low key trip to a space spa that we can enjoy for our first class, so....not a lot of prep work needed for this one, everyone up, hop on through, and we'll get started!"