Fandom High School

Aww, welcome back to the last class in the Danger Shop Theater. The popcorn was even back and everything for you guys.

"It's the end of the semester... in the middle of the summer, or the start of the summer, however you want to look at it," Jaye began. "Which is good because I can only take so many Nicolas Cage movies. He's actually not even a bad actor, but just, seriously, dude, look at scripts before you say yes. Also- and this is just a tip for life in general- if you're going to name your kid after a comic book superhero, please give them one that they can lie about later in life. Or in kindergarten.

"Anyway, your last movie is about a Nicolas Cage trying to stop all these disasters before they happen, or something. I don't know anyone who's seen it. I haven't even seen it. So it's new to all of us."

"Every once in a while, Nicolas Cage seems to make a decent enough movie," Jaye began. Also hi and happy Monday, students! Jaye might not say that, but the narrative would. "This one is about a treasure hunt and stealing the Declaration of Independence and stuff. Oh, and there's like popcorn here or something? I didn't program that into the theater, it was a glitch, but I guess go ahead and get some as long as you don't throw it at me."

Because from the back she was in a way better position to throw it at you.

Jaye didn't know why she always got classes on Monday when that meant she had to work on what should really be a three-day weekend, but at the same time, what Jaye did couldn't really be called 'work.' Still, she couldn't sleep in, so, meh.

"Today we're getting the meta for Con Air, a movie about Nicolas Cage on a flight full of convicts where they get control of the plane and everything goes bad. Basically you get to hang out here and watch a movie with a lot of explosions and then head out to get tan or barbecue or sleeping some more, all way more viable options for your Memorial Day than sitting here."

She paused. "You still have to stay here though. You showed up, that's your own fault."

A new semester, a new class in the Danger Shop Theater. Well, it was sort a new class. More like it was the same class with a new name and no essays. Not that Jaye remembered to give out essays last semester. Anyway.

"Welcome to Nicolas Cage Appreciation," she began. "If you're not supposed to be here... fake it. Everyone's going to look at you funny if you walk out on a movie class like you have something better to do." Very helpful, Jaye. "Today we're going to be watching one of his early works, but first I want you to stand up and tell me who you are and one thing you like about Nicolas Cage."

Meaning you had to make something up, probably.