Fandom High School

The final was taking place in the Danger Shop today. The door to the Shop opened into a decent-sized studio apartment, but from the windows, an entire cityscape could be seen. "Welcome to the last class," Cindy said, giving them all a smile. "You've been a great class and I hope some of what we've learned this semester has been useful to you and will continue to be so for as long as you stay at Fandom. Our final today is a practical, so don't worry about notes or essays or anything like that. This is a class with real-world applications, so it only makes sense to test it in a real-world setting."

Well, as 'real world' as people get in the Danger Shop.

"Your exam is going to be pretty simple. You're going to spend an evening with a friend, including cooking them dinner here in your apartment." She pointed to the kitchen, complete there was a sink, a fridge, a tiny stove, a dishwasher, and a microwave oven. "You must plan out and execute the entire evening, starting with contacting your friend, going to the store for the meal, figuring out an activity, and making sure your apartment is ready for company." With the touch of a button, the apartment became rather messy, with dishes piling in the sink, dirty carpets, and a pile of laundry. "You also want to stay under budget," Cindy said, handing out a plastic "credit" card to each of them. "There's $50 on each of these," she explained. "So you're going to be limited in what you can do. Take a taxi somewhere, and you'll be limited to making ramen for dinner. Cook an extravagant meal, and you'll need to stay in and watch movies tonight. Either of those options are fine--it can be a very cheap night of ramen and DVDs--just make sure you keep your budget in mind when you're planning your evening."

She went over to the door to the apartment and opened it. "There are identical apartments for all of you, so scatter and start figuring out what you're doing tonight."

[OCD up!]

"So, your final is in two weeks," Cindy said when class began, having asked everyone to meet her in the Danger Shop again. "Next week, we'll have a review session, so please come to class with your notes and some questions prepared. Today, however, we're going to take some time to learn a little more about the changes in two major areas of science: aviation, which opened up this world to us, and spaceflight, which may open up the solar system to us in as little as the next few decades."

With the touch of a few buttons DC's National Air and Space Museum appeared in front of them. "We have an hour," Cindy said, "so feel free to explore, but make sure to catch at least a few of the exhibits, okay?" And then she made shooing motions with her hands. "Go forth! Learn! Have fun!"

[OCD up. Finally]

"So, this class wasn't on the syllabus," Cindy said as her students filed into the Danger Shop, "but with Parent's Weekend quickly approaching, I thought it would be a good lesson to have. You've already learned about some of the most important appliances in a house like the fridge and the microwave which can help you not starve to death. Today, we're going to cover a few appliances of lesser importance that still may help you to survive, assuming you have guests that are sticklers for neatness and tidiness."

Cindy pressed a button and several machines appeared: a vacuum, a dishwasher, and a clothing washer and drier. "The dishwasher probably won't help much this weekend, as I doubt your rooms are equipped with one, but these others can help you keep your dorm clean. Even if you are personally predisposed to neatness, these machines were invented to make cleaning much faster and less tedious that it had been in centuries prior."

Demonstrating one machine at a time, Cindy went over how each one worked, including a brief mini-lesson in checking tags and warnings to make sure that clothes were sorted properly and that everything loaded into the dishwasher was labeled 'dishwasher-safe' and another to demonstrate what each of the attachments on the vacuum was good for.

"Items made of delicate materials--which can include silks and satins for fabrics and crystal and china for dishware--should be hand washed and set aside to dry," she explained. "The temperatures and abrupt motions can easily destroy such things. Remember to check the tags and labels for everything you think might be delicate and follow those instructions, unless you fancy having your belongings ruined. Another tip to keep in mind is that most vacuums have a 'bare floor' setting which means that it can be used in lieu of a broom at need. We're going to take some time to practice with all of these appliances, so that your dorm can be made ready for anyone who shows up this weekend."

With another touch of a button, the class found themselves inside a mansion--one that was sadly in need of a good cleaning. In addition to piles of laundry, dirty dishes, and filthy carpets everywhere, there were also windows in need of cleaning, floors begging to be scrubbed, cobwebs that needed removing, and furniture that almost begged for a dusting and polish. There were also piles of clean aprons, hair nets, and rubber gloves for the donning, as well as many common household cleaners, like soaps in aerosol cans and toilet cleaners with duck-shaped necks to get under toilet bowl lids. "Let's see how much of this place you can get cleaned in an hour," Cindy said cheerfully, "using 21st century cleaners and appliances."

[OCD up]

They were back in the computer lab today. "So, several classes ago, we discussed the internet as a venue for communication, with email and instant messaging clients. However, the internet is so much more than that as well. Whether you want to find out who that familiar looking actor is in the TV show you're watching, buy clothing, check the scores to the sport's game, find out what the Defenestration of Prague was, or watch a music video, these are all things you can do on the internet."

Her monitor was hooked up to the projector, so she brought her mouse over and clicked on the Firefox icon on the desktop. "Web browsers let users navigate from one page to the next on the web via links. These links are the specific addresses of the pages you would like to access; they can be as simple as typing in google.com or can be incredibly complex, spanning many numbers, letters, and characters."

She continued in this vein for awhile, explaining search engines, wikis, and blogs, as well as giving historical information on the founding of the internet. That segued into a discussion of safety online, both to protect their machines from viruses, trojans, and spyware and to keep themselves and their information safe and secure.

"It doesn't matter what your email tells you," she said, grinning a little. "There are no Nigerian princes who want to give you a million dollars. The biggest problem with the internet is anonimity; the person you're talking to might be the nineteen year old girl from Cleveland like she's claiming, but she could just as easily be a forty-four year old man from Denver. Be very careful about what kind of information you give to others and if you come across anything that makes you uncomfortable, tell someone, okay? Since the inception of the internet as a commercial tool, an entire new kind of crime called cybercrime has flourished. Be safe, be careful, be smart, okay?"

[OCD up]

Once again, the class met in the Danger Shop mocked up to be a mall. This time, Cindy was waiting by a bench in between an ice cream shop and a clothing boutique. "So, last week, you learned what you could buy with $500," she said, giving the students a grin that could only be described as 'shark-like.' "But that's only half the lesson. Having money is one thing. Earning it is another. So, today, you all have jobs."

Was that a shiver going down everyone's backs? Because it should be.

"So, today we have two options: food service--" she pointed to the ice cream parlor "--and retail." She pointed across to the clothing store, which looked to be having a sale. "Elphaba and Cally, you two are assigned to the boutique. Warren and Rilla, you two are working at the ice cream parlor." She glanced at her watch. "And according to the time, you're all about five minutes late for your shifts. You might want to dash. Both stores look pretty busy."

Hers was an evil laugh.

"At the end of the hour, we'll reconvene and discuss what you've learned."

[Hold for OCD up]

Today's planned lesson got scrapped; there was no way in hell Cindy was going to try to get generator power working in the Danger Shop. The class could wait until next week to learn about money.

Instead, Cindy sent out an email saying We'll be studying TV and movies today in class. Feel free to skip today's lesson in favor of researching them in the dorms. All of you should be checking email regularly now, so no complaining you didn't get this. --C. Perrault

For those that did show up today, Cindy had set up a small coffee pot in the room once she'd gotten the generator going and was blasting the heat, so at least the room was toasty. "Welcome to those of you who made it. In the 21st century, one of the primary forms of entertainment is watching the television. In developed nations, the majority of homes have at least one TV, and many have several. TVs offer a variety of programming, including news, nature documentaries, sporting events, talk shows, dramas, situational comedies, and more. For all that people complain that there is 'nothing' on, there are hundreds of hours of television programming aired every week. The difficulty comes in finding something that appeals to your particular tastes."

"Movies are stories filmed with moving images. These can be seen on the TV, or in movie theaters, where they can be watched on a large screen and with an advanced sound system. Going to the movies is considered a common dating practice, as a trip to the movies offers both entertainment and also a semblance of privacy, since the lights go down to better view the screen. Most movie theaters have codes of conduct which they expect people to adhere to. The biggest rule is minimal talking during the showing, and as technology has improved, they've added such rules as: silencing cell phones, no texting during the film, and no illicit recording of the movie."

"Both television and movies have been subjected to censorship, in regards to what is suitable to be shown to which audiences. In the 1930's, Hollywood introduced The Hays Code, which was replaced in 1968 with the MPAA's rating system. Propriety on the television is monitored by the FCC, which has the right to fine and punish stations which air inappropriate content, as usually defined by a watershed or 'safe harbor', which is the time delineated for adult programming. Programming with adult themes--usually graphic violence, sexual content, profanity, and drug use--can be shown only at certain times for the protection of children."

With that, Cindy judged she'd given them enough of a background and turned on the DVD player. "Today, we'll be watching 'Blink,' an episode from Britain's iconic Mister What. It does well as a stand-alone episode, in that you don't need to know much more about it than the title character is a time-traveler who gads about saving the day a lot. Enjoy it."

[OCD up.]

It was the first class and Cindy had made sure to arrive early with coffee and pastries to set up. Considering her class was all about getting used to a new time or place, she figured the classroom should be as welcoming as possible, too. She pulled the desks into a small circle with the desk holding the pastries and coffee in the center.

"Good morning," she said as the class filed in and took their seats. "Welcome to Intro to the 21st Century. I'm Professor Cindy Perrault; calling me Cindy is fine, though I'll also answer to Professor or Ms. Perrault. Here, I intend to teach you enough for you to find your footing in a world that can often be strange and confusing even after you leave Fandom Island. For those of you from the past, some of our scientific achievements might seem to border on the impossible. For those of you who come from the past, much of our technology and social mores might seem frightfully primitive. From those of you who have come from different worlds all together...well, your reaction might fall anywhere within that range or might be something else entirely. Fifteen weeks isn't enough to teach your enough for you to pass as a native of this time and place, but hopefully it will be enough to help you navigate through the strangeness until you're at least comfortable in the day to day life in 21st century America."

( Even if day to day life on Fandom conspired to confuse everyone. )

Cindy gestured to the pastries in the center of the circle. "The first week of classes is traditionally devoted to introductions and far be it for me to buck hallowed Fandom traditions. So help yourself to something to eat and drink, and tell us your name, class, one way that Fandom completely differs from your home, and one way it's surprisingly similar. Feel free to find commonalities between your individual homes as well."

[OCD up]