Loki was being his usual lazy self when the students started arriving today. The chairs here were just so fucking comfortable that he couldn't help himself. And it gave him a good opportunity to watch everyone filing in and doing their pre-class thing before he got up and started talking.

"Today we're talking about something I'm sure you've all had or wanted to have at one point or another," Loki said, clasping his hands together. "Girlfriends, boyfriends, lovers, and friends with benefits. Hopefully, just from the words alone you can tell the differences but, if not, I'll be helpful."

"Girlfriends and boyfriends should be fucking obvious. It's the person you're hooked up with and it usually means you're only seeing that person. You're going steady, in other words. I hate the fucking phrase, it's so girly. If you've got a girlfriend or a boyfriend, you're usually considered off the fucking market and now it's about dealing with the other person's little quirks. If you can deal with that, you might even head into long term relationship territory. If you can't? Get the fuck out while you can. The worst thing you can do is carry on a relationship when you don't want to. It's going to be fucking painful in the end and the other person is going to fucking resent you. Really, if you're in a relationship, it's going to be about push and pull. Give and get. And sex, probably, but that's between you guys."

Loki paused, trying to pinpoint anyone in the class that might fall into that category before he started in on the next topic. "Now, lovers and friends with benefits are different. Here, you're not going to get all the other mushy gushy stuff you would if you were in a relationship. Lovers usually mean it's just for sex. One night stands, illicit affairs, that kind of shit. You'll see that person, do the deed and leave. Friends with benefits means you're sleeping with your best friend/good friend, what the fuck ever because you both want the sexual side of the relationship but nothing else. These, in my opinion, are a lot easier to handle. You don't get the shitty feelings that come with relationships but you get the good stuff. Of course, these two things do have the ability to move into relationship territory if one or more of the participants develops feelings. If one person develops then, then it might turn out ugly but both people developing feelings has happened. Then, it's up to the two of you, or three if you're kinky, to figure out what the fuck to do. Sometimes, people don't want to ruin the dynamic of a friendly relationship by bringing their emotions into it."

Loki couldn't help thinking of Bartleby here. He'd deny it if anyone asked. "So, for today's class, I want to hear one problem you've had in a relationship, any kind of relationship, you've had and how you dealt with it. I don't care if you ran away or punched the other person in the face. This class is about learning to deal with people in all kinds of ways and learning from each other is more fun than me just talking the entire time. So, go."