"Right," Eliot said at the top of the class. "So we've been slackin' pretty hard on the 'economics' side of things so far. Y'all got your check books, but I ain't even bothered pricin' any of our materials so far this semester. Mostly because I think their whole 'pay fake money for your class supplies' plan is a bunch of crap."

At least he was honest?

"So today we're gonna focus in on that for a little bit, hopefully in a more realistic way then they wanted us to. At the very least, we're gonna try to keep things more up-to-date than they'd be usin' this curriculum. Today you're going to put together a mock budget. And we're gonna use the internet to do it.

"First thing's first: budgets are hard. Everyone thinks they know what money should get spent on, but no one really wants to pay attention to how much things actually cost. They definitely don't want to admit to the fact that money itself is totally imaginary. Economic laws ain't natural laws. We put together these enormous systems and then figured out how those systems actually worked as we went along. Plenty of cultures in the multiverse don't bother with money, but plenty of 'em do, which means learnin' how to work the system's a good idea.

"A couple of things to keep in mind when you're putting together a budget: number one, be honest. If you spend five hundred bucks a month on groceries, tellin' yourself you only get two hundred a month doesn't mean you'll spend less, it means you'll break your budget. Maybe buyin' a shit ton of candles is important to you. Alright, that's fine, but you gotta reflect that in your budget. An extra thousand bucks for candles isn't going to magically appear. You have to know how much you're realistically earning and how much you're realistically going to spend. I ain't saying you can't change your patterns at all. There wouldn't be much point in doin' this at all if you couldn't use it to actually manage your spending. I'm saying when you're starting out, you want to be completely honest about where your money is actually going, and how much things actually cost.

"Alright, item number two: be flexible. Shit happens. It happens a lot. The minute you micromanage your every last cent into categories, your car's gonna break down or the island's gonna steal all your shirts, and you'll have a sudden, unexpected expense you gotta work around. That's just gonna happen. If you give yourself some flexibility in your budget, you can do it. There'll be a lot of expenses that you run into that are non-negotiable, things like rent and bills and the like, but there'll be stuff that you can work with. Maybe this month you'll buy slightly less candles. Promise yourself you can save up for that extra special smelly one you got your eye on next month, if that helps make it easier. If you've been honest about your priorities, you'll have a better idea of where you can give yourself some wiggle room.

"And lastly: give yourself permission to ask for help. Pooling resources with people you trust is a great way to keep all of you afloat when things get rough moneywise. Maybe they're roommates, maybe they're lovers, maybe it's just a financial planner. No man or woman or gem is an island and all that.

"Which brings us to today's assignment: I want you all to pair up. Or, hell, threeway up if that's how you wanna work it. Either way, get into teams. Those of you who ain't as familiar with 21st century earth tech, I recommend you find someone who is to work with, because like I said, we're usin' the internet. I want you all to write up a list of what you think your expenses will be like, after you leave school and go out to live on your own. What are you going to spend your money on? Housing? Food? Transportation? Do you want to make sure you have money for parties? How about furtherin' your education? Figure out what'll be important to the two of you as a team, then hit the 'net and try to work out what that'll actually cost. Pick an area of the Earth you'd want to live in and look up the local rental prices for apartment,s or property values if you want to maybe own a house. Take a look at grocery stores and see how much food might cost you. Or appearance modifiers, if you're not one for eating. You want to be able to keep up with the latest tech, price that stuff as well. Try to work out how much you'll have to earn per month to live the way you want to live. This is kinda workin' backwards from how most folks do it for real, when they've got an income and they work out how much they can afford, instead of seeing how much they'll have to earn, but hey, you're students, you get to have a little bit of fun with it. Set yourselves up in your dream lives, and then see what kinds of jobs you might want to get to pay for 'em. You ain't got to actually spend this money right now, so hey. Shoot for the stars."