Lily had J,GOB for the class today. It seemed like it was easier to cushion some of what she was talking about with baked goods.

"Last week you started racking up credit card debt. This week we're going to learn about what happens when you don't pay it off," she said. "I'm sorry, I tried to keep the math out as much as possible. I know it's summer, so I'll try to keep it short. Say you have $7,000 of debt. They start tacking on something called interest, which means if you don't pay right away, they charge you more or what you haven't paid yet. So if you pay off $1,000 at a time, you're paying the $6,000 left over, plus whatever they tack on, so you can't really catch up unless you pay off everything at once. Forget just paying the minimum and figuring you'll be fine. Your kids' college fund will be that much less because you're still paying off that pair of Jimmy Choo's you bought ten years ago.

"And when you stop paying, that's when the phone calls start." Pause for dramatic effect. "They usually start out with 'Hi, Ms. Insert Your Name Here, this is so and so from Random Bill Collection Agency. This is an attempt to collect a debt and any information gained will be used' yadda yadda oh my god I know this by heart. They'll try to get you to make a payment right there and then, and if you tell them no, they tend to get a little shirty with you. You can make an arrangement to pay, too, or if you haven't paid in so long that it's become a bad debt, they'll try to get you to settle. This means they'll take off a chunk of what you owe, if you can pay what they're asking all at once. Though this kind of sucks because if you had the money to blow all at once like that, wouldn't you have already paid? Really.

"So what you guys are going to do today is deal with bill collectors. Pair up, one of you being the bad guy- I mean, collector- the other being the poor hardworking soul trying to pay their way through. Be as hard as you want on each other, or not. It's summer vacation, I can't really care that much if you don't take harassing each other seriously." Pause for thoughtful reflection. "Actually, I would take not harassing each other seriously as a good thing. Carry on."